The Greatest American Copywriter Wasn't A "Mad Man".

He is a Midwestern son of a preacher who as an adman vomited before presentations, not from liquor like that hack Don Draper, but from fear—fear that a new client wouldn't have the balls to buy his ballsy ads. Read more about him, and see many of his best ads in my weekly post on VICE.

Social Media Managers are Dipshits, continued...

This new "digital creative class" is an embarrassment to the advertising industry. None of these dipshits could have cut it at even the lowest level of a good creative ad agency just 10 years ago. I've compiled and commented on the worst social media updates of 2014 (so far) by major brands, including JC Penney's asinine Super Bowl stunt, and the two brilliant MLK tweets, above. READ.

Quick Response Advertising, by Germany's Blush Lingerie.

Reference.
Via.
Three previous Blush ads here.

ALWAYS BE BRANDING, MOTHERFUCKERS.

Click images. Via Yokohama, Japan.
Via.

FTD Florists presents the four Whitest couples in the history of advertising.

After watching these four Valentine's Day commercials via the 100 year-old flower delivery company, you will seriously consider celibacy. They are THAT BAD. copyranter on VICE.

This new Canadian Gay Rights spot is better than all the Super Bowl Ads. Combined.

See, you clueless fucking American ad agencies? ONE simple insight. A creative linchpin that's fresh and shiny and pristine, unsullied by puppies and horses and bears and celebrities and fucking Danica Patrick. Bravo, Rethink, Canada (the responsible ad agency).

I call BULLSHIT on Doritos' "Crash The Super Bowl" contest results.

The above "Finger Cleaner" spot has over 600,000 more views on YouTube than the two winners that aired during the game, combined.
Read more about it on VICE.