Wednesday, June 04, 2008

GIRDLE AD RIDDLE.

(click ad for closer look)
OK, smartasses. What the FUCK is going on in this retro Perma-lift girdle ad? A Venus statue with fall foliage about its feet and a partially-eaten apple sitting on its head. GO AHEAD—interpret away in the comments, geniuses. This is even more puzzling than the 1958 lipstick lesbians in $1.00 bras ad, the 1968 American Airlines hot mom stewardess ad, and the 1959 why is the Marlboro man in Paris ad. (image via)

12 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmm, Venus represents beauty (and maybe vanity) and the apple has something to do with Eve, maybe?

6:27 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

Ladies! Wear this here ugly-ass girdle thingy and you too can have the flattering appearance of the inherently vindictive Roman goddess of Love!

7:16 PM  
Blogger Syd said...

I don't know. But, that bra could poke an eye out.

8:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

She seems to think; "What if I wear two of these - will it double the effect?"
The apple - no idea. Maybe Perma-lift are from Switzerland. The foliage serves to partly cover the white goo which seems to ooze from the statue's leg.
And that goo is for someone else to explain further.

8:13 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

She seems to have discovered the secret to a stunning figure (see the "oh, hey now!?!" look on her face)... just like Oprah told the world about Spanks, this ad is letting us in on this closely guarded trick used by hotties everywhere - bb has bitten into the apple of knowledge and is now so pretty, hot and tempting that she'll just be getting ravished around the clock, hopefully in a flirty fun pile of fall leaves

11:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Venus with a half-eaten apple. If I was a bettin' classically trained writer - I would say:

Wearing this tight-ass girdle will give you beauty worthy of a Greek Goddess and as tempting as an apple to the lovely Eve. The Leaves just hide the snakes and evil ad-men of yesteryear.

In no way will you look like a sausage wrapped in casing so tight your chicken cutlets flap free in the breeze.

2:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Apple could be a reference to the beauty-off that Paris had to judge which then led to the Trojan war. A golden apple was the prize that Venus (I think) was awarded.
Or not.

5:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I thought the apple and the leaves were way too literal references to "fallen" women... and the lady here is all too happy to "fall" into fun sexy times.

10:17 AM  
Blogger llcooljessie said...

All that crap said above sounds right to me. A mix of Christian and Greek mythology. Still, I can't imagine trying to explain this to my art director. "I need an apple in there, you know... with a bite out of it. Maybe uh, put it on top of that Venus statue I was talking about earlier? Hey, where are you going to work in that branch of autumnal foliage I mentioned?"

12:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Venus's symbol was a golden girdle, hence her placement in a girdle ad. As for the apple, the second anonymous was correct. Venus was awarded a golden apple when Paris judged her the most beautiful. I'm not sure what the deal is with the leaves, though.

5:05 PM  
Blogger copyranter said...

THANK you anon, for your elucidation.

5:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The text line at the bottom with the b...b's highlighted -- in case you get so excited about the girdle and Eden reference, the bb's remind you of BOOBIES. God forbid we forget the boobies.

12:59 AM  

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