Musk and Cheese.
(click ad, via) Women of the 70s knew Jovan-scented swordsmen were a cut above. They called you on their Oral Sex phone. They wore a Time To Fuck watch on first dates. Once inside their pad, they laid you down gently on their Love Rug™. Afterwards, they hung their rumpled leisure suits on spread leg hangers. (Seriously, this is actually refreshing when compared to today's bullshit Axe ads.)