I GLOVE NEW YORK.

Did ya know there are germs on subway poles? I KNOW! ICKY EWW EWW!!! And, ya know, with the exception of those poles, every other surface you touch in New York City is pure pristine cleanliness. If only someone would invent sheaths (click image) of some sort that I could place my hands into so that I could then safely grab the mustard gas-coated poles. But, not just any old gloves, no, they'd have to look like something a member of an indie rock outfit might wear on stage, maybe with some iconic artwork that signified that I was, indeed, an idiotic, paranoid New Yorker.
(from Sunday's New York Times. link.)