Link Haze, 5/16/08.

• Swedish Fish ads? meh. Swedish Fish delivery truck? heh. (link)
• A recipe for wiener water soup. (link)
• This BBC radio review of Iron Man is the kind of nuanced insightfulness missing here in the colonies. (link)
• So, the GOP's fancy new party slogan is the exact same one used to market anti-depressant Effexor. (link)
• Sorry I Called You Sweetie—a good emo band name. (link)
• I was frantically looking for a screwdriver to gouge my eardrums out whilst watching/listening to this Home Depot training film. (link)
• Gold Bond is breath mint for your balls. (link)
• A true mystery: what is the Nasonex bee's nationality? (link)
• Obsessive Star Wars fans could channel that energy into saving the planet. Instead, we get shit like this. (link)
• You say 'Hello Kitty,' I say 'Goodbye Kitty.' (link)
• Mixed media paintings by Ian Francis. (link)
• Before sticking a flute up her hoo-hah in American Pie, a young, innocent Alyson Hannigan shilled for Mylanta. (link)
• The DC Metro installs hopscotch and I Spy in stations in effort to stop people from hurling themselves in front of trains. Yeah, this'll work beautifully. (link)
• Contextual ad oops, UK analog edition (thanks Mark Russell). (link)
• Join the Navy. Get blown up. (link)
• Red Bull gives you wings? How 'bout stabilizers? (link)
• A short film: New York City pigeons having sex. (link)
• craigslist ad of the week: "I have lots of imitation crab meat." (link)
• I vehemently disagree with this Vice "do." (link)
• I'd actually been rooting for Donny Deutsch and his TV show—until he took his shirt off last week (again), and said he could be NYC mayor if he wanted. (link)
• Sweet Jesus, a Mr. Rogers porno is cumming. (link, via)
• Finally, pants-optional CEO Dov Charney spotted on the LES, with murse. (link)