Monday, July 24, 2006


Did ya know there are germs on subway poles? I KNOW! ICKY EWW EWW!!! And, ya know, with the exception of those poles, every other surface you touch in New York City is pure pristine cleanliness. If only someone would invent sheaths (click image) of some sort that I could place my hands into so that I could then safely grab the mustard gas-coated poles. But, not just any old gloves, no, they'd have to look like something a member of an indie rock outfit might wear on stage, maybe with some iconic artwork that signified that I was, indeed, an idiotic, paranoid New Yorker.
(from Sunday's New York Times. link.)


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Purell, my friend, Purell. I buy it by the gallon just for that purpose. Those subway poles are NASTY.

11:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am very confused by people afraid of germs on subway poles. What, do you guys all suck your thumbs or something? Do you not have access to running water for extended periods during the day? I can't wait til bloomingdales starts carrying them, I'll run right out and sneeze all over the insides of them.

2:52 PM  
Blogger Matt Brand said...

'ol MJackson was way ahead of his time...

3:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The circa-80's-style gloves call for the obvious new wave reference, but since nobody's stepped up to the plate, I suppose I have to do the honors:

I remember searching for the perfect words
I was hoping you might change your mind
I remember a soldier sleeping next to me
riding on the Metro...

8:51 PM  
Blogger copyranter said...

Berlin! nice one, Jumper!

9:47 AM  
Blogger Maulleigh said...

I need a pair of these. Do they come in "Six Train Industrial Strength?"

10:54 AM  
Blogger pinknest said...

don't forget to buy your own straphanger as well.

3:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anyone caught carrying Purell or a Tide Stain Stick in NY, should be immediately ejected from the city. We all know the dirtiest places on earth are the bathrooms of suburban Barnes&Nobles.

5:10 PM  

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