Thursday, January 12, 2006

MY MOSTEST WORSTEST HEADLINE OF 2005.

Why stop there? This boffo borrowed-interest concept has legs like a caterpillar, baby.

You Balance Your Head on Your Neck. What About Your Portfolio?

You Balance Your Senses of Dread and Optimism. What About Your Portfolio?

You Balance the Ashtray on Your Lover's Smooth Taut Ass While Toking and Plowing Her/His Bunghole and Slapping His/Her Sweet Cheeks. What About Your Portfolio?

8 Comments:

Blogger Mike Bawden said...

You balanced a beer on her head while she, er, "defrosted your zipper." What about your portfolio?

10:04 AM  
Anonymous dealer said...

Imagine you were a garage - hell, you could flip that baby easy as: 'You balance your portfolio. What about your tires?' That's what we call a 2-for-1, right there.

11:18 AM  
Blogger ElMachino said...

The layout is nicely balanced too. In fact, it's perfectly balanced.

11:40 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You should show more of the crap you write.

12:41 PM  
Blogger copyranter said...

yes, readers not familiar with design. as elmachino points out, to perfectly cut an ad in half is a first-thing-you-learn-in-design-school no-no.

3:02 PM  
Blogger spinachdip said...

This tires-portfolio parallel is pure genius. I mean, if you do it to your tires, why would you do it to your portfolio?

You rotate your tires. What about your portfolio?
You inflate your tires. What about your portfolio?
You change your tires. What about your portfolio?
You kick your tires. What about your portfolio?
You put chains on your tires. What about your portfolio?

Also, put your headline in all caps when in doubt.

6:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh god... I love you. :-)

2:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Let's return to the question at hand...

What about you minding your own business?

How's about you kiss my ass?

You kiss your CD with that keyboard?

What about it?

10:16 AM  

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