Friday, January 06, 2006

Worst. Anthropomorphism. EVER.

This Courvoisier NYC subway campaign (via worldwide advertising clusterfuck Publicis) takes anthropomorphism down to an F train level.
What did you say to me, bottle of cognac that looks like pussy? No, you're not beautiful. You're fucking fat and your head is all kinds of messed up. You fucking French think you're better than everyone else. Parlez-vous...shut the fuck up? Give me your wallet and your fucking iPod before I smash you into a thousand fucking pieces you foul-smelling Fuck.

18 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

What? You don't think that looks like a wide open blood engorged pussy?

hmmmmm, maybe you're gay? or I'm just a pervert?

12:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

haha, that's a good one.

12:41 PM  
Blogger copyranter said...

Well frankly first anon, a pussy THAT big ain't that inviting to me. Just sayin'.

1:02 PM  
Anonymous kowgurl said...

And how 'bout the illiterate (non) use of punctation? Retards.

1:49 PM  
Blogger Robyn said...

I was surrounded by those ads in one subway and...they freaked me out. I couldn't figure out why. Well, one thing was "Why are these drinks talking to me? I...don't..like them...oh jesus, they're in my brain...oh god, nightmares, etc." ...Yeah.

3:20 PM  
Anonymous C-Los said...

leave it to a french agency to do a campaign for a french product and this what you get.

4:27 PM  
Blogger David said...

Truthfully, it is a curvaceous, powerful, feminine (yet at the same time, rather penile) bottle, and the smoke and everything is cool - but I just can't deal with the vanity.

This ad is more befitting to Amaretto.

4:31 PM  
Anonymous aicphead said...

shite ad but it's one of the best cognacs. brandy anyone?

9:42 PM  
Blogger copyranter said...

david, yes it is a nice-looking bottle. But, as a human being it's pretty fucking ugly.

11:35 AM  
Blogger David said...

Indeed. On top of that, I just now noticed that there's a period instead of a question mark after the "aren't I," which makes me want to spray paint obscenities over the entire vain (and of course, anthropomorphic) thing. New York subway riders, Engage!

3:48 PM  
Blogger Max said...

Shittiest ads ever! I look up at them and think "no you aren't beautiful and more over I don't drink that bullshit"

Now if they were Grey Goose ads....

6:11 PM  
Blogger angrycopywriter said...

uh you can blame publicis uk and allied domecq (the client) for that one. nahh, just blame the pretentious eurotrash at publicis uk. in case you haven't noticed, the only decent publicis outpost is in seattle.

10:59 PM  
Blogger Dancewriter said...

How about this one?


More Advertising Nonsense

1:58 PM  
Blogger copyranter said...

That's good one. Ad people don't always worry about pesky "reality", just as long as the spot sells the product's benefit. Sad.

9:20 PM  
Anonymous everysandwich said...

It might be nice as a body part, in profile, but I'd have to be pretty baked to see even that. I'll try and get back to you.

8:19 PM  
Anonymous rijec dana said...

only a brand manager could ever think this bottle is beautiful...

4:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

bad punctuation. but no one also mentioned the bad grammar.

"i are not beautiful" doesn't work so neither does "beautiful, aren't i"

except in colloquial settings, like a blog comment . selling fancy liquor is not one of those settings.

3:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you're the idiots, there is no problem with the grammar or the punctuation! It's a statement, not a question, dumb ass. Also, reverse the last phrase CORRECTLY, it's: "Are not I beautiful?" Auckward, but technically correct.

4:24 PM  

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