Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Alex, get upstairs and put your big pants on!

(click image)
A-Rod? Milk? I seriously doubt it. No, the most disingenuous athlete in the history of sports probably starts every morning with a 5am shot of an illegal, proprietary, platelet-infused proton/electrolyte concoction that costs $1,000 an ounce (then he spends 3 hours flossing and grooming his hair). So, sorry Little Leaguers. If you want to grow up to be a $25 million a year Major League douchebag, Milk ain't the answer. You're better off soaking yourself every day in Derek Jeter's Driven. And Alex? I'm sure those Gay rumors over the years have reached your ears. Just a heads up dudeā€”this ad is going to be hung in more than a few NYC gym lockers this Fall.

previously:
1. Yankee Clubhouse Soon To Smell Like Whorehouse.
2. Is IT In YOU?

5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's a man-gravy variation on the Dirty Sanchez, no?

11:09 AM  
Blogger ninaberries said...

with all the hormones in milk these days (one reason kids are bigger and fatter than ever), i think this is an appropriate ad. though the tagline should be: milk, the gateway drug.

3:19 PM  
Blogger DCThrowback said...

Ummm...Yeah, that's the ticket, Nina. Jeez-us.

3:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe if he drank more milk he wouldn't choke that much.

3:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Blast by A-Rod"?!?

No additional comment needed.

10:46 AM  

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