Urnie Banks?

Die-hard Cubs fans, this may be your only chance to be there in person when your cursed team finally wins it all. Starting opening day, fans of 8 Major League clubs can purchase officially licensed MLB urns at select funeral homes. They're aluminum with a mini homeplate base. They cost...$699. Word is Yankee owner George Steinbrenner has already pre-ordered his, with instructions for it to be permanently welded to the GM's desk.
UPDATE: Richie Ashburn? (snicker)
previously in baseball:
1. My shrink said 'watch more baseball.'
2. Moises Alou pees on his hands.
3. A-Rod, put your big pants on!
4. Yankee Clubhouse to smell like Whorehouse.