Take a Canary Islands Christmas vacation with your polar bear friend before he dies.

Say "no" to Winter blues, and "yes" to global warming. Polar bears are understandably suicidal these days. So take it upon yourself to go grab one and take him to this beautiful Spanish archipelago this holiday season. Build sand snowmen together. Play frisbee. Get drunk at outdoor pillow-strewn clubs. Who knows? He may rather die there in the dangerously hot weather than return to his dying home (thanks to Fintan O'Higgins of Dublin for the tip).