Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Copulating molecules sell men's hair gel.

(click ads for closer look)
göt2b, you've got2b kidding.
Ads are for göt2b's (what an idiotic name for a brand) magnetík hair gel. Copy reads: "pheromone infused hair gel, for better chemistry." Apparently, the core target audience for this crap is institutes of technology frat boys. Axe has, amazingly, already convinced a substantial number of alpha males that girlie-spraying their bodies will help them get laid. Old Spice sort of copied Axe's dubious strategy. And now, göt2b (jesus, that name. it's perfect. for 8-year-old girls.) has picked up the stupid scent. There's even a Website where you can create your own "sex molecule." But first! You have to confirm that you're 18+ to perform such a mature task. Remember, this is all for fucking mooky hair gel "infused" with insect sweat.
(ads via BBDO West, via)


Blogger Jeff Koromi said...

Who believes this pheromone crap, my god. This reminds me of when they used to put shit like heroine in tonic to "make babies cry less at night." I wonder what actually is in the gel.

9:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He got some molecular discharge in her ion.

12:17 PM  
Blogger copyranter said...

We have a new commenter champion. ALL hail "garrito"

12:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


Too bad she tested positive.

12:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ejaculating car wash sells hair gel. By VO5 (HA!) Check out the "How Victory Hair Gets Made" ad.

1:20 PM  
Blogger Payo said...

Sounds like these guys thought "There's Something About Mary" was a documentary.

2:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If you're dumb enough to believe this bollocks, you shouldn't be allowed to have hair.

4:06 PM  
Blogger hillary b said...

garrito is my new hero.

let's be real-- guys who buy this shit would actually be humping a blacked out chick in the backseat, doing a kegstand to impress(?) a college freshman, or circle jerking with his other rejected broseph buddies

11:47 PM  
Blogger UnrulyDuckling said...

I've never seen any of the ridiculously stupid marketing for got2b, but I buy their products and will continue to do so because they are one of the few products widely available in drug stores and grocery stores that don't test on animals. Now, I never heard of this pheromone infused crap before, and I don't really want to contemplate where they get the "pheromones."

It's too bad they inflict suffering on us innocent media consumers, but at least they leave the puppies and bunnies out of it. Why couldn't they put that in the commercials?

Also, I'm just butting in over here after finding your blog at Feministing. I didn't see animal rights activists in the list of things you hate, so I thought I'd add my two cents.

7:35 PM  
Blogger tc said...

Yes this is bad. I think, as you say, they're mixing their demographics. The people who would buy this shit....and no, it's not German, in spite of the umlaut........think those are the constructible toy parts that you use when you're a kid. They probably don't even know we are made up of...hell, they think we're all robots.

6:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Bizarrely, pheromone colognes do work. Pherose turns my husband into a panting freak when I wear it.

12:50 PM  
Blogger ivandnav said...

I just workup a little funk in the pits, not too much. It works. I've been tackled to the ground. Works for me too. I hate perfumes. I like the girls to smell like themselves.

1:39 AM  
Blogger Elise said...

What cracks me up is that, with the umlaut markings, the gel's name sounds like "gertoobie," which you have to admit is freaking awesome.

If you're not trying to sell Magical Rape Potion, anyways.

5:24 PM  

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