Thursday, May 11, 2006

Yep. She's Lost.

This is Evangeline Lilly from ABC's Lost. I don't watch network TV, so I didn't know who the fuck she was. What I do know is that this is about the most fucked up celebrity endorsment ad I've ever seen (click image). Karastan carpet? Says Evangeline in the copy: "My friends say their favorite thing about me is that every day, I'm a different person." Soon as I finished reading that, I was on the phone to my local Karastan retailer. Why are those chess pieces too damn big for the carpet squares? Why is the wall carpeted? Why isn't she dressed in a checkered dress? What is she looking at? Did she get to keep the big chess pieces? Why Evangeline Lilly?

22 Comments:

Blogger Twiddle said...

I thought it was an ad for giant chess pieces...

11:34 AM  
Blogger Slinky Redfoot said...

good point what the fuck are those idiots selling anyway?

11:43 AM  
Blogger The Man Himself said...

Everyday she's a different person. I hope tomorrow she changes the color scheme to red and black so we can finally get a game of giant checkers going!

11:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Everyday she's a different person." Maybe she's talking about the agents she should be firing for getting her crappy endorsements.

12:02 PM  
Anonymous Narnia said...

"With an ecclectic sense of style, Evangeline makes a statement. Her own."

Why are those chess pieces too damn big for the carpet squares?
Because she's outgrown the game.

12:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't celebrities (I'm using the term loosely here) usually go to foreign countries if they're going to "pawn" (sorry) their fame for a crappy endorsement deal? Maybe Evangeline thought Karastan was an obscure country in the Middle East. Boy, she must've been pissed when she saw the ad running in a U.S. glossy.

12:31 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well fuck me if you all didn't miss the point completely.

Let me read between the lines for you.

You got the pawn (bald black man) behind, the queen (lesbian) in front and the horse of course (Ron Jeremy) to the side.

She wore grey instead of checkers to make me want to lick her abs.

1:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't forget the most insipid copy of all: Make a statement. Your own.

Brilliant. Simply brilliant. Junior writers at in-house department store agencies the world over are taking notice.

2:11 PM  
Blogger The Tart said...

Was this the one that went to jail? If yes, maybe that's why the walls are covered in carpet. Who knows?

Smooch,
The Tart
; )

2:59 PM  
Blogger concha said...

because like her character, the people who did this ad are also lost.

3:21 PM  
Blogger Make the logo bigger said...

“King me?”

4:36 PM  
Blogger Evil Discussor said...

Here's my statement:

If I had to tie my shoes in such an elaborate fashion every time I put them on, I'd just go barefoot.

There, I said it.

4:37 PM  
Blogger serialcareergirl said...

Forget the copy - and it is forgettable - this looks like she's an extra from 60's acid trip TV series The Prisoner about to play a maniacal game of giant chess

8:17 PM  
Blogger Noblesse Oblige said...

This ad is such an easy target to make fun of. So many things come to mind...but nothing sticks...I like their stupidity.

10:58 PM  
Blogger ElMachino said...

Never thought I'd say this, but I think a bigger logo would actually help this ad. Actually, if the logo were the only thing on the page, that'd help even more.

9:55 AM  
Blogger Make the logo bigger said...

el - I approve of the logo in its current size and no larger. Sorry. Just saying.

11:30 AM  
Blogger ElMachino said...

I will trust your expertise on this point. How about just a blank page then?

Has Evangeline already taken care of the Bishop?

12:33 PM  
Anonymous Jumper Bailey said...

"Make a statement. Your own."

Best kind to make, I think. It helps prevent copyright infringement lawsuits.

As to the statement "My friends say their favorite thing about me is that every day, I'm a different person," I can only say that the resemblence is striking.

6:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I also noticed that suddenly she has tits. Maybe she Does change everyday.

1:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It so sad how now, all you need is a celeb in an ad- no creative, effective copy. Can we just make sense here people!

2:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes if there's one thing an all-american tv starlet needs to do right now it's promote rug jockeys.


Karastan! It sounds like a war torn republic that Anderson Cooper will be parachuting into any second.

Is she masquerading as Diana Prince? Pick up the news girl!

My q: where can one GET those chess pieces?

5:20 PM  
Blogger Marj said...

I think she is about to change into a man with a giant penis.

6:44 PM  

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