Fake Chairman of the Board.
ad from Ameriprise Financial for retirement planning, scanned from the Wall Street Journal. I trimmed off the body copy because no one reads fucking body copy. Just FYI, it talks about how Ameriprise is "redefining" (cough. hack.) retirement planning because they focus on your "dreams" not numbers. As you can see, they've established a service mark for "Dreams don't retire" (hack. cough.). However, this man is not being guided through his dream-filled retirement by Ameriprise, because this man is a model...NOW, why the fuck he's standing on a fucking chair is the real mystery here. Guesses?
previously in stupid corporate ads:
1. Rest now Bling Bling...
2. The Good Hands Bad Taste People.
3. "Trees are pretty. Let's us trees."
4. bp. beyond poppycock.