Monday, January 23, 2006

Taglines are DUMB, #1.

Here, we have the new Bud Select gem, Expect Everything (click image. sorry, a little dark.). Expect everything? My friends (and enemies), this is a line that went through focus groups and across the desks of several marketing MBA "whizzes." So, let's say...:
1. ...I twist open a Bud Select at a bar and I instantly turn into a Dodo Bird? Should've expected it.
2. ...I pick up a six-pack at the liquor store. At the exact moment of transaction, the universe folds in on itself forming a bouillon cube? Should've expected it.
3. ...At a party, I grab a bottle of Bud Select out of the fridge and I involuntarily fart loudly but even worse the fart continues like a smoke alarm that can't be disconnected though on the somewhat plus side it smells like furniture polish? Again, I should've expected it.

11 Comments:

Anonymous advertisingwithoutpity said...

and what exactly is going on in that ad? "expect" two chicks to do the freaknasty all over eaech other while you stand behind them with a scary look on your face?

11:01 AM  
Blogger David said...

Expect to be making Bud Mud following copious consumption.

11:49 AM  
Blogger DC1974 said...

Perhaps this was focus grouped through Boy Scout troops. Or Bud thinks that's their target market. One or the other.

11:50 AM  
Blogger spinachdip said...

In its defense, "Expect Everything" says the same thing "Prepare for Hallucinations, Loud Ringing In The Head, and Explosive Diarrhea the Next Morning" does, but much more tactfully.

3:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If they did indeed focus group this, they got exactly what they deserved: crap. I can just see "Barry," the know-it-all loudmouth of the group: "I like this approach. When I drink a beer I expect everything. Women who previously ignored me will suddenly become enthralled with my 300-pound beauty. This is brilliant...everybody agrees, right? RIGHT?" "Oh, uh, yeah, Barry, this is great." And the idiot client puts another check mark by this campaign idea, as the agency team shudders and eats another handful of peanut M&Ms.

9:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Marketing guys + advertising guys = amazing combination.

9:57 AM  
Blogger Weave said...

Bud Select. Expect Everything. But taste.

6:54 PM  
Blogger csnyder said...

Subway ad? All those Bud subway campaigns are about raunchy, beer induced club sex that is somehow both urban gritty and crisp and clean at the same time.

A bit like "new car smell" or even... Budweiser itself. I have to say these guys are geniuses, and the dumb tagline is just the tip of the iceberg.

9:17 AM  
Blogger Allegra said...

This post completely made me laugh out loud.

I have to admit, one of my few subway joys is mentally adding subtext to the liquor (particularly Bud) ads they plaster all over the cars.

1:50 PM  
Anonymous Raya said...

No, no, but what about the version of this ad that has a reclining swimwear-clad lady holding the (rather stubby) Bud. Sel. bottle so it lines up just right to be....her erect penis, if she had one? With the only problems being (1) if it WERE an erect penis, it'd be a disappointingly small one, and (2) how wide, really, is the appeal of a chick with a penis?

But then, maybe "Expect Everything" more than covers "...including a hot babe with a hard-on, albeit a disappointingly small one."

11:32 PM  
Anonymous thegoldenkancil said...

Anon:
"If they did indeed focus group this, they got exactly what they deserved: crap. I can just see "Barry," the know-it-all loudmouth of the group: "I like this approach. When I drink a beer I expect everything. Women who previously ignored me will suddenly become enthralled with my 300-pound beauty. This is brilliant...everybody agrees, right? RIGHT?" "Oh, uh, yeah, Barry, this is great." And the idiot client puts another check mark by this campaign idea, as the agency team shudders and eats another handful of peanut M&Ms."

I've been to that place. (walks away)

8:50 PM  

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