Yes, it's true. The mouthless douchebag—the deliverer of the worst bar pick-up lines in pick-up line history, and the worst spokesman in ad history—sent me a friend request. And I accepted. A portion of our cheery text message exchange so far, above. (Here's where I murdered him.)
I'm disappointed that the Fleshlight-loving troll hasn't stayed in character while messaging me: The Balvenie Weenie® would never say "Thunderdome that shit."