Tuesday, October 16, 2007

THIS IS YOUR WAKE-UP CALL, STUPIDITY.


(click ad for closer look)
This is one of those special convergences—bad product and bad ad. But which is worse? Tough call. The product is...Caffeinated Schnapps. Caffeinated Scnnapps? Caffeinated Schnapps? Have you ever tasted Schnapps? ( if you have, you know what I'm saying.) At their Website, the line repeated over and over by Sexing Voiceover Woman is "cold as your soul" which I kinda get—because you're gonna wanna drink this shit as cold as possible so that you taste it as little as possible. (One of the flavors is Mango Chili [puke].) I'd rather mix some enviga or Dead Bull or even Schaefer with fucking Schnapps and see if I could keep that down.
OK, now the ad, which was scanned from ESPN magazine. So, it's a female boxer? And she's wearing fishnets? But there are two male boxers outside the ring staring at her? So it's a "tough" product but it's also for the Ladies? And is there anything I'd want to drink less while boxing than Caffeinated Fucking Schnapps? What the fuck is going on here?

12 Comments:

Blogger TexanInHippieland said...

"This Is Your Wake Up Call"?

So we're supposed to start our day with a shot?

7:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Copyranter, copyranter. Whoa there fella, you're gonna blow a vessel! And for what? Cuz of bling-gurl and her ring-side buddies where the only color in her life is tied up to a bottle of rock-gut?
No, no - chill baby, mango chill.

(PS. did you check out the website? Well, you've had a big day, maybe wait till tomorrow. But if you could explain the wolf...)

8:13 PM  
Blogger ricpic said...

She's stupid, vicious and sexy as all getout. My ideal woman.

8:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cheap liquor and a trashy girl in slutty clothes. Her pimp looking on and the last john barely out of the picture. Thats the Wide-eye man lifestyle in a nutshell. Way to go, douchebags. I'm so bored.

11:54 PM  
Blogger hillary b said...

Also, if you look closely at her hands, the bottle is clearly 'shopped in. so, apparently even the woman in the ad doesn't drink this. schnapps can only mean one thing- teenage girl with peach flavored puke.

1:02 AM  
Blogger R. Zach Thomas said...

Drank a half bottle of peppermint schnapps as a sophomore in high school. Spent the night sleeping in the bushes, covered in tears and puke. With this stuff, I could be wide awake in someone's landscaping, getting intimate with my half-digested dinner. Genius!

9:05 AM  
Anonymous employee of the year said...

I'll pay five whole dollars to see the agency brief that ended in this.

11:37 AM  
Blogger Kevin Erskine said...

It wasn't just in sports magazines, I saw it in a business mag.

Plus she isn't that hot and dresses like Madonna circa 1987

12:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Have any of you tried it?! The Cherry Bomb is GREAT (the others suck!!) They had a taste-test at a UGA tailgate party. It was cold outside, but this kept you warm & energized...and made my nipples hard!

4:41 PM  
Blogger raidergurl said...

and still none of you noticed the word sex is spelled out in her hair... true its upside down but the braid is capable of making sence of it...and you'd never even notice....look closely its on the right side the curl at the very bottom is the 'S' the next curl makes a faint lower case 'e' and the 'x' is very visible. Flip the ad upside down and you'll see it better

3:11 PM  
Blogger Miss Havisham said...

I think it's an honest ad. Crap for crap.

8:11 PM  
Blogger Miss Havisham said...

Oh, and I ordered the boots. (hybrid-crossover-ad-fashion-booze)

8:15 PM  

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