Monday, October 15, 2007

The current condom technology blows.


(click ad for closer look)
Last week, more than 100 "condom experts" came together (heh) in South Korea to hammer (heh) out new specifications and testing requirements for prophylactics. "Our job is to do away with inferior condoms," said Eng Long (heh) Ong, meeting chairman. But the big news at the conference was an American company, TheyFit, offering what it says are the world's first custom-fit condoms.
Which brings me to the above lie-of-an-ad for "ultra thin" condomi condoms, a German brand. IF ONLY! I think I speak for more than a few gentlemen when I say customization is fine and all, but let's go to greater research lengths (heh) to develop the thinnest goddamn condoms scientifically possible! Now! If we can develop bionic women and high tech gum and space-age Ziploc®, then thinner condoms should be a fucking snap (ouch)!
Note: condomi claims to be the only sellers of a completely vegan line of rubbers. Their condoms also come in a variety of flavors, which I guess you can mix and match with your new tasty flavored lubricants.
(scanned from Archive)
previously in SEX marketing:
1. Tom Fords A Valley.
2. You've cum a long way, baby.
3. The Village Voice Sex Ad Awards (the Vexys).
4. The Penis Patch™. You'll Be Tight In Any Hatch!
5. Your body is a temple. And your vagina is the door.

7 Comments:

Blogger Make the logo bigger said...

You missed a (heh) after “Their condoms also come...”

Just sayin.

1:32 PM  
Blogger Mike said...

Hey--does the jockey in the weird claritin horse racing ad sound and look just like David Sedaris?

2:47 PM  
Blogger copyranter said...

claritin is an allergy medicine, yes? So unless one is allergic to rubber, that has nothing to do with this post...

But to address your question, I haven't seen it and can't find it on YouTube.

3:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm really into the vagina-colored bubble wand.

3:31 PM  
Anonymous JC said...

"Is it really safe? Because I am not a man, I am dynamite." (Nietzsche)

4:07 PM  
Blogger Make the logo bigger said...

The jockey is Kevin Mangold. His website and the Claritin commercial are here.

And looking for that on iFilm, they were also featuring a Hooters Pageant clip.

Nietzsche’s birthday.
Hooters.
Jockeys.
Claritin.

A thread for the ages.

10:15 PM  
Blogger ricpic said...

A big dick trumps philosophy.
--Frederick "Little Willie" Nichy

11:43 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home