Thursday, November 30, 2006

Naples Lumber. Everything you need to get the (blow) job done.

(click image)
Naples Lumber & Supply Company ad
scanned from the latest Naples Illustrated (great magazine). Now, there are plenty of examples of phallicism in ads out there. But I am very impressed by the complete lack of creativity executed here. Why not just go ahead and have the woman fellating the electric "screw" driver?
previously in sex in ads:
1. You've Cum A Long Way, Baby.
2. The Bowlmor Girls. Now With Zero Bowling.
3. It's not strange. You just need to come out fella.
4. Bud tells Gays OK to be Gay.


Blogger HighJive said...

the company plans to change its name to nipples lumber & supply company

12:51 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Spending time in Florida lately?

1:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Perhaps they are having a sale on eyescrews?

1:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Poor screwdriver. When the screwdriver teaser withdraws, it's gonna go limp.

4:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cheapest contacts ever.
And what's with the shadow on her face, does that um, relate to the window thing?
Almost the outline of the WIndows logo...hmm, maybe not.

6:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

check out the model up against the wall on the homepage of

6:55 AM  
Blogger copyranter said...

note to commenters: notice how "jetpacks" added to the "experience" known as "copyranter."

7:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

check out the model up against the wall on the homepage of

Makes me want to freak my wainscoting.

9:17 AM  
Blogger Scamp said...

Naples Lumber. Got wood?

9:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry your Rantship...should've been like this...

check out the model up against the wall
over at napleslumber

11:44 AM  
Blogger HighJive said...

it's odd that they opted against doing more with the services section, where they discuss the company's "truss" engineers.

1:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, what about those Pepper Dennis Ads for that Rebecca Romijn vehicle - she's on her back, legs up in the air with the mike inches from her lips - absolutely gorgeous! And Pepper Dennis ! See what fun you can have with those letters anagramatically speaking, copyfag! No doubt "Deep Penis" will be your favorite ! Jus kidding douchey, lay off of screenwriters ...

10:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I once read a recommendation for Covergirl Outlast Lipstick from a real life prostitute saying that it had survived the following things in the one day:
- six blow jobs
- five hot sex sessions
- seven showers
- lunch and dinner
- 35 cigarettes

and was still going strong at the end of the day!

5:31 AM  
Blogger Evilyn Garnett said...

Like the honesty of the styling in this add. She's made up like the kind of mid-to-freelance level "escort" one of these guys might actually get serviced by. Forget those Robert Palmer Glam-droids. ZZ Top had it right, Ho Ho Ho. I'd say they did a great job targeting their demo.

3:40 PM  

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