Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Edge. Dull.

(click ads to read headlines)
X-Games 13 starts next week. Asstastic!!! And Edge is an official sponsor—because, they're edgy, dudes. And, I guess, to mimic the stereotypical lazy persona of sk8ter boyz, the ad peeps, like, laid down some Xtremely languid language (almost as languid as this) that lamely ties Edge products to the action by the loosest of thread-age. "Cooling conditioners as invigorating as shredding pipe?" Welcome to the Zzzz Games, bro. Why don't you, like, go sponsor Senior Golf, Granddad? (note the expert product-holding technique of the models)
(ads appeared as consecutive pages in the latest ESPN magazine)
previously in specious sports marketing:
1. Reebok running shoes help prevent puking.
2. Johnnie Walker. Official sports drink of the New York Yankees.
3. Head & Shoulders draws dandruff-like pass play in man's hair.
4. Urnie Banks (snicker)?
5. New York Knicks: Experience It. "It" being Misery.


Blogger Chris said...

And...snap! She breaks his neck.

10:16 AM  
Blogger Brooks said...

I couldn't figure out why Wayne Brady or Kevin James were standing in front of a half pipe. Then I remembered how this entire ad is a steaming pile, and looking for logic is a waste of time when I should be back at my desk, shredding pipe.

Edge: Now with 50% MORE Desperation! (to tie into an irrelevant event)

Next up: The Greater Cleveland Heavy Metal Battle of the Bands! brought to you by Smuckers

10:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


10:28 AM  
Blogger huffer1 said...

I'm going to grow a beard now out of principle.

Seriously - does Edge or Edge's agency employ anyone under the age of 40?

Edge: Radical to the Extreme!

11:49 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

PLEASE tell me you saw the recent Bud Light ads on the subway... they are some of the worst yet. They have moved on from "Always Worth It NYC" to "It's Flippin' Cold NYC"... just go to the Bud Light homepage and you will see the art/etc.

2:27 PM  
Blogger hillary b said...

i'm so glad someone else noticed that the white dude is about to have his neck broken. let's pray this is the guy who came up with the copy.

3:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

“It’s Edgetastic!”

7:55 PM  
Blogger Triple talaq said...

And with that, the search for Simon Cowell's bastard son subsides.

Congrats, white guy on the right. You win!

2:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like the small steamy turd design at the bottom of the can.

1:22 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home