Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Duck-Voiced Men Have Needs, Too.


Since he was recently voted the unsexiest man in the world, I thought Gilbert Gottfried would make the perfect pitchman for the popular Fleshlight male sex toy. We brought him in to do spec radio for the product. Here’s the script, as recorded, for the first :30 spot:
(sfx: squeaking, muffled repetitive pounding)
Gottfried (breathing heavily, talking in a “jerking” manner): Hell-lo Gil-bert Gottttfried here, world’s un-un-un-sexist mmmman, exxx-tollllling the vir-vir-virtues of the Flessh-light sex toyeee…I’ve been tolllld it feels j-j-just like the real thinggg. I don’t know a-a-about that b-b-but it does feel s-s-s-o GOD damn fuck-ing goooood. Oh. Oh. Oh! AF-FLAC!!!
sexy female V/O: The Fleshlight. 30 seconds to heaven.
Still waiting to hear back from parent company Interactive Life Forms, Inc.

5 Comments:

Anonymous shadow said...

If the client doesn't go with the unsexiest man in the world persona, then they'll go the Jay Mohr route.

can't wait for the black, asian and latina mash ups!

9:41 AM  
Anonymous LisaBinDaCity said...

Note to self: do NOT read copyranter's posts when eating.

ICK!!!!!!!!!!

8:52 PM  
Blogger the sightspeed guy said...

Is it just me, or does the Flashlight look like the Eye of Sauron?

3:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fleshlight

10:41 AM  
Anonymous Matthew said...

Actually, this product fairly screams for a late-night infomercial...

9:15 PM  

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