Thursday, March 30, 2006

Time to egest (thank you Roget).

I hate Watches. (I know, 'what don't you hate, asshole?'). Anyway, meet the Flower™ (Yes, they trademarked the name. Hilarious). I stumbled across it in the overly obnoxious Hollywood Life magazine. A call to Meyers' toll-free number, and nice lady quoted me the price of $15,700. Or, for about $15,699 less, you could eat a bag of skittles, stick your finger down your throat, throw up on your wrist, stick your cheap Timex® piece in the goo, and wait for the project to harden.

14 Comments:

Blogger Mindspy said...

And for some reason I get the opinion that that concoction would look better too.

8:16 AM  
Blogger Cranky said...

Copyranter, you are my mentor

9:06 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

holy shit, hands down your best post to date.

1:01 PM  
Blogger EVIL DISCUSSOR said...

Copyranter, I want to put my wee wee in your hoo hoo.

1:03 PM  
Blogger copyranter said...

"...but I break just like a little girl."

3:08 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This is the best blog I've ever read hands down, no doubt. Better than gawker and the rest....enough ass kissing...

3:25 PM  
Blogger dancing at gunpoint said...

I think I saw Tucker Carlson wearing that watch on tv the other night?

3:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Now THAT made me laugh.

4:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

cr - Get the Olsen twins and Lindsey Lohan to make their own limited edition celebrity versions – why not, the skittles wouldn’t stay down for long anyway. Add an AIDS charity angle to it and there you go. You could triple that asking price on ebay.

4:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

that hot bitch Jessica Cutler posted about them roaches last week.

and yes, I would like to golden shower her. aren't I original.

7:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I, too, am an advertising copywriter. After being fucked for 16 years by clients, I'm glad I can get my Flower back for a mere 15k.

12:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

breaks just like a little girl...um, last i checked that was dylan, not zeppelin

3:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

marketing guy is too busy listening to stereolab in order to get his musical references right.

12:41 PM  
Anonymous A guy said...

wateva hey hu wants to be my mentor? :P

9:42 PM  

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