(seriously nsfw) In new Russia, stewardesses stripsearch selves.

(click images) Not to be out-sexed by their competitor's bikini jet-wash video, Aeroflot, Russia's largest airline, shot this calendar last month to be given as a gift to their (male) VIP fliers. Apparently, this is a calendar for 2011(?), and Aeroflot is not happy that the pages have been leaked to the Web, according to adme.ru. Ha, you're probably seeing it before Putin does. Everything in Russia sex! Plumbing (nsfw) sex! Tires sex! Car insurance (nsfw) sex! Sausage sex! Vodka sex! Beer sex! Even Burger King sex!

Russian Ad Watch: (mildly NSFW) Can you guess what these office mud wrestlers are selling?

(via) The answer is in the comments. Thanks to Marina Galperina at ANIMAL NY for the translation. The novice women were trained in the art of mud wrestling for a week before the actual shooting began, according to the agency press note (Agency: Ravoshod). Continue to know this: EVERY ad in new red hot Communist Russia Sex, Sex, Sex, Sex. SEX. (All links various degrees of NSFW.)

Voting is Sex, says Putin's new election commercial.

Think about Vlad, ladies, as you stroke and pull the lever.
Russia's next Parliamentary elections are December 4th. And virile Vlad's United Russia party's popularity has recently fallen from 60 to 51%, according to the Guardian. Expect to see him soon wrestling, killing, and then eating, raw, a bear in front of lots of press.
In the meantime, his party just released this commercial showing two sexy young Russian voters sexing each up other sexily in a polling booth. The end line is "Let's do it together".
Gennady Gudkov, an influential Duma deputy, said Wednesday that he would ask prosecutors and the country's election commission to investigate the advert – not for its sexual content, but for violating the constitution.
"United Russia has forgotten that voting in Russia is meant to be secret," said Gudkov, a member of A Just Russia, a Kremlin-sanctioned opposition party. "According to the law, a person who drops their ballot in the box must be in the booth completely alone."
He'll be drinking some Polonium-laced tea any day now.
Because in Putin's Russia: EVERYTHING SEX!
Last fall, Spain's socialist party produced a spot showing a woman orgasming as she voted.

(nsfw!) The 2011 Russian Anti-Freeze Hotties Calendar.

(click images, via) Nord is an auto supplies company. This in their anti-freeze calendar. Because in new Russia, everything SEX. Tires? SEX. Plumbing supplies? SEX. Airlines? SEX. Beer? SEX. Car insurance? SEX. Electronics? SEX. Stay tuned—another sexxxy calendar for a Russian oil & gas company is in the queue!

EVERYTHING IN NEW RUSSIA SEX.

(via) Avianova, Russia's #1 discount airline, wants fliers to know that one of their many money-saving measures is to hire bikini models to wash their planes in lieu of paying for more expensive industrial cleanings. Or something like that. I have nothing else to say, other than that my next post will feature go-go dancers promoting a Russian tire company (really). Previously in Sexy Russia: sexy sausage billboard • sexy Burger King steam bath commercial • sexy (nsfw) plumbing company calendar • sexy beer packaging • sexy deli meat ad • sexy vodka ad • sexy (nsfw) car insurance spot.

Russian Ad Watch: Maxwell House coffee sold without sex.

(via) Well zip up my pants! Not everything in new Russia sex. This pillowheads spot for Maxwell House instant coffee is by the Ogilvy Group. It's kinda interesting, the exploding pillowheads, and—not at all sexy! They should have cast an implanted stripper as the woman swimming. Previously in not sexy Russian commercials: Britney Spears helps Russian women learn English.

Crazy Russian Commercial of the Week.

(via) And that's how the big nuts get into your Nestlé Nuts candy bar—carried by squirrel-babes wearing tight yellow shorts and helmets with some type of antenna on them. I don't understand that part. It's apparently a continuing theme. The tagline says something about loading your brain (Russians, please help with the translation). By JWT Russia. The Everything In New Russia Sex! thread continues.
Previous crazy Russian commercials:
Russian Crazy® Cola is Crazy • The Burger King is Crazy • Car Insurance is Crazy • English language school is Crazy • Deodorant is Crazy • Tire company is Crazy.

EVERYTHING IN RUSSIA SEX (cont).

(via) As promised, it's the Altay Tire Company Better Traction Rubber Dancers.
It's Russia Sexy Day!

The winner for the strangest use of a condom in an ad ever is...

(click ad, via) update: commenter Irene says it's an HIV awareness ad? My apologies. Still, a strange visual. Rough translation: "A complete set of the road rubber." IN RUSSIA, EVERYTHING SEX! MILK? SEX! WORK BOOTS? SEX! VERMOUTH? SEX! AND, YES, FUCKING TIRES...СЕКС!

Design update: T&A motorcycle helmets.

(click images, via) Here you go, sleazy riders. Let the ladies know you were born to be fucking wild. The titty headgear even features a nipple piercing. Concept designs by Kazakhstan ad agency Good. As we know, everything in Russia sex (nsfw)! (Not part of Russia, I know.)

(slightly NSFW) Oh, look: nude Russian models are selling something.

(click ads, via) Centro is a shoe brand. In new Russia, shoes=sex. In new Russia, everything sex. EVERYTHING. Is Vladimir Putin's overwhelming virility to blame for this sexidemic? Perestroika? Vodka?

(nsfw) In New Russia, Tires are SEX.

(click images, via) Previously this year, the Altay Tyre company produced a sexxxy TV commercial featuring the Better Traction Rubber Dancers. Here, they wanted to do a very un-Pirelli calendar with no "sickly affectation or sugar poses," according to their ad agency, Punk You (yes, that's their name). From the agency press notes (translated):
The studio was "saturated with incredible combination of flavors tires and body oils. Every four hours, came to us naked girls, who by the end of the fifth day of shooting brought our photographers to a moral decline." I BET. In New Russia, EVERYTHING SEX. Previous Erotic Russian business calendars (nsfw):
• Aeroflot airlines.
• Some plumbing supplies company.

In Russia, "The Last Exorcism" promoted with orgasming women.

Because, say it with me loyal copyranter readers: In new Russia, (nsfw) EVERYTHING SEX! (sigh) Anyway, you've probably seen the viral marketing hatched by Lionsgate on chatroulette to scare up interest for their horror film, opening Friday. Well, the movie debuts September 9th in Russia according to adme.ru, and local distribution company Volga Film went a different orgasmic-er promo route. I command you, out of her body, pleasurable little earthquakes! Previously in: the female orgasm.

copyranter's top 5 BuzzFeed posts of the week.

• Nine most depressing ad rewrites from "Depressed Copywriter"
• Ladies! Would you wear these fashion tights?
• The best Pictionary ads you'll ever see in your life.
• The back of a Canadian Corn Pops box.
• This is how they're selling mobile phones in Russia (SEX).

Russian Ad Watch: Silly gay safe sex commercials.

(via) Russia is of course a terribly homophobic country, though, I've got news for you, virile Vladimir: Commie homos are surreptitiously spanking it to all your hot shirtless pics. Anyway, above are two fairly new spots via LaSky, an HIV/STD prevention non-profit. They're both goofy and unsubtle—the hockey helmet one is especially cringe-inducing. But this is Russia, so anything is better than nothing. And how many times have we seen gays embracing in a bedroom in an American PSA? I hope the actors haven't been assaulted. Previous Russian PSAs:
• Anti-abortion posters.
• Kids tell you why they can't quit smoking.
• School boys eating feces in anti-drug spot.
• and the famous psychotic alcoholic talking squirrel.

Free beer condiment packets in Russian Maxim magazine.

(click images, via) Kozel, a Czech lager, attached one sample packet each of their light and dark beers to a spread ad in the mook mag. The idea was to get readers to become mixologists and blend the flavors to their own taste. "Hey man—if we buy, like, 100 Maxims, we could get a couple of free beers. Let's go!" This wouldn't be legal in the US, right? Speaking of mooks and Maxim, a reminder: in new Russia, Beer is Sex! Ad agency: 3sba. Previously: Czech beer commercial presents magical world where women are blow-up sex dolls.

Europe's largest electronics retailer employs three-boobed babe to advertise in Russia.

(click images) Loose billboard translation (Russians, help me): "You will find more than you expect." Media Markt, headquartered in Germany, first used the tri-titted strategy in its home country. Now, they've brought it east. The billboard hangs in Moscow, according to adme.ru. The other three images are from the Russian Media Markt website. No fair! Where's the man with multiple penes?
I've said it before, and I'll keep saying it, as long as the evidence keeps supporting it: In new Russia—everything sex! Previously: Tits sell anything/everything.

Link Haze, 6/25/10.

• CHAOS.
• "Don't taz my Granny!"
• $250,000 carbecue in Brooklyn.
• Fucked-up fashion shoot of the week.
• Darwin Award winner via The Ukraine.
• Feds make major border bust in Arizona.
• woman collects 32,000 teabags over 11 years.
• today is the day to turn your cursor into a sequined glove.
• In Russia everything sex! Including commercial property development.

Russian Ad Watch: Topless models present Avianova's 250 ruble fares (briefly nsfw).

(via) In new potent Putin Russia, EVERYTHING SEX (nsfw). Last summer, Avianova, a discount carrier, revealed that one of their money-saving measures was to enlist bikini models to clean their planes. Now, this new bit of sleaziness to promote their cheap domestic fares. (That's about 10 bucks to fly anywhere in-country.) Note the inclusion of one lonely naked dude who of course makes a penis joke.
Related: Aeroflot's nude flight attendant calendar (very nsfw).

(nsfw) Creepy Sexualized Retouching of the Week.

(click image) The Devil's cello? (Where's the minion's bow, though?) Adme.ru recently posted a collection of prints by Russian retouchers. This disturbing image is by Andrey Razoomovsky, who specializes in creepy sexualized shots (like this nsfw set). His stuff is pretty cheesy. But, in new Russia, everything SEX (nsfw)! Previously in Creepy Sexualized Retouching: Penis Eye Man • Tri-Breasted Woman.