Hey, at least he gives oral.

(click ad) "His name's Vlad. I like him, but he only wants to date me every 28 days..." You may say 'ewww,' but blood is blood to the undead. Not at all surprisingly, the creative team from Switzerland that dreamed up this bloodcurdling o.b. tampon ad is all-male. But at least, like this French shark-infested Tampax ad and unlike every American tampon ad ever made, they've acknowledged that blood does in fact come out of a cooter.
previously in: tampon/pad ads.
previously in: scary all-male creative team ads.
update: The ad agency contacted me to report that this ad was never published. Also, a rep from o.b. responded in the comments.

Today in Pubes-Vertising (sfw).

(click ad, via) For Blundstone workboots. Talk about your out of left field, disconnected sell. On the plus side, the creatives (yes, all male team) can brag to their buds at the pub that they got pubic hairs in an ad. WOOT. Wonder if it actually is their pubes? My educated guess? Yes. Ad agency: AJF Partnership, Melbourne, Australia.
Previously in Pubes-Vertising:
• American Apparel (nsfw!)
• MTV's Staying Alive (sorta nsfw).

The most sexist beer ads ever produced?

(click ads for closer look)
WOW. I thought this Czech blow-up doll beer commercial was bad. These ads for Coopers Premium Light Lager via Singapore (all male creative team, naturally) hit women with a double shot of misogyny. "Only 2.9% alcohol" reads the copy, meaning you'll stay sober enough to notice that the pretty party girl is a fatty(L) and that the chesty bar girl is an ugly (she's quite cute, actually). I'm not even going to go into all the bad Photoshopping/retouching. And these ads just won a bronze medal in the Press category at the Cannes advertising festival. Amazingly, unforgivably tasteless. (previously: 1, 2 more examples of misogynistic ads)
update 6pm: you'll notice that that blond has an engagement ring on her left hand. Also you'll notice that the freckled-girl is very young. So, I think that my pretty/fatty, chesty/ugly interpretation is not what the agency/advertiser is trying to communicate. They're trying to say 'drinking Coopers keeps you from hitting on engaged women or underage girls.' Though, judging by the comments, they've failed miserably (but still, why is the blond overweight? Anybody?). Either way, they're still bad, sexist ads. update: What do you think? Go vote on a poll about the ads on PollsBoutique.

(nsfw) Do these breast cancer ads bug you, ladies?

(click ads, via) I'm so sorry for that headline. Copy translation: "More than 80% of lumps are benign. Do not be afraid. Do a breast self-exam." Because, women are scared of self-exams. And bugs, of course. Fyi: all-male creative team. The art director, I'm sure, spent days Photoshopping all kinds of bug images onto many, many shots of boobs. Client: Associação da Luta Contra o Cancer. Ad agency: DDB Mozambique. Previously in: Breast Cancer Awareness Ads (some NSFW).

bp Oil Spill—the bikini calendar (sfw).

(click images) From the press note of the Surfrider Foundation (started by surfers in 1990 to protect the ocean and its coastlines):
"Last year's oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico left a deep impression in people's minds. To remember this catastrophe, we have a created a calendar with photos of young naiads covered in oil...This calendar, which will be offered to all members of Surfrider Foundation Europe, is also designed to help recruit new volunteers..."
I call (partial) Photoshop! Also, slimy insensitivity! All male creative team! What a surprise! Ad agency: Y&R Paris. See the rest of the calendar here.
Previous uncomfortable girlie calendars:
• The coffin cuties of Italy (nsfw).
• The Matchbox Barbie calendar.
• and the X-ray nudie skeleton calendar.
related: nine nudie Russian business calendars (nsfw).

copyranter on ANIMAL NEW YORK: calling all women with PMS!

Today on Animal New York, I posted an ad for Panadol PMS relief tablets. It was created by an all-male creative team. Female readers, please go give your opinion of the billboard (link).

Fresh Catch of the Day: Misogyny.

(click ad, via)
"HA! God a fucking CUNT! That's a fucking good one. Pass me another Bud, you gay fuck. You know all this fish smell reminds me of something, can you guess what that something is? Your wife's snatch! Ha, I wouldn't go down on her with that fish's mouth! Speaking of that fish's mouth, I just took a shit in it—you'll taste that later, buddy! Fuck, I fucking hate my bitch, she's useless. Clean, cook, and blow me—is that so fucking hard? God, I wish I could stay out here forever (starts sobbing heavily)." Ad agency: Small Army, Boston, all-male creative team, duh. But seriously, that's a questionable ad headline. Previously in: Misogynistic ads.

DDB Canada brands itself with mismatched boobs.

(click image) Asked by the National Advertising Benevolent Society to submit a monthly page for its 2009 swimsuit calendar(?), the Vancouver office of Doyle Dane Bernbach came up with this Photoshopped woman featuring a DD-cup boob and a B-cup boob (looks more like a C). Not surprisingly, the creative team was all male. You stay benevolent, Great White North ad guys. Previously in bad agency self-promos: one, two.

Yes, that's a Farting Pelican.

(click ad, via) Previously, via Australia, we saw a Farting Tuna for John West's tuna & beans. Now, via Lima Peru ad agency Publicidad Causa, a very gassy sea bird for Anchomar sardina picante (spicy sardines). (butt-head laugh). All male creative team, of course.

Retouching studio uncreatively mocks homely overweight women.

(via) This would be a choice assignment for any CW or AD: there are endless ways to smartly sell the digital chops of a retoucher. This is not one of them. All male creative team, unsurprisingly. Client: Cake Imagery. Ad agency: DDB Vancouver, who previously promoted themselves using a bikini model retouched with mismatched DD and B boobs (get it?). Previous retoucher ads:
• (nsfw) He's a cockeyed optimist.
• (nsfw) Russian retoucher's creepy ad.
• Do you girls suck dick with that creativity?

TV commercial: Menstruating women are vikings.

(via) Via Chile, for Kitadol menstrual relief pills. In previous print ads from the campaign, PMS-ing women were represented by an angry heavyweight boxer and a Mexican wrestler. Ad agency: Prolam Y&R, Santiago. All-male creative team, FYI.

(nsfw-ish) Gratuitous Ass-vertising of the Week.

(click ad, via) Hey, I ♥ a bubble butt way more than the next ass man. But this piece of Ass-vertising for some spa in Delhi is a tad forced. I don't know my Indian first names very well, but it appears to be an all-male creative team behind this viz of an apple-bottomed woman drowning in a bubble bath. Ad agency: Out Of The Box, Delhi, India. Related: here's nine previous stops on the Gratuitous Ass-vertising World Tour (some nsfw).

When men make PMS-related ads: Example 3.

(click ad, via) "Get her back." Previously in this campaign for Kitadol Periodo Menstrual by an all-male creative team at Santiago, Chile ad agency Prolam Y&R, PMS turned a woman into a Mexican wrestler. Here, she's been transformed into a hulking, simmering heavyweight boxer. Here's the first example, for Panadol via Singapore, featuring a police robot delivering the medication to a holed-up PMS-ing psycho woman.

copyranter on ANIMAL NY: Kitadol.

Once again, an all-male creative team has created a PMS-related ad. It features a Mexican wrestler. (link)

wonderbra turns a button-down blouse into a deadly weapon.

(click ad) The Milan office of UK agency Leagas Delaney and wonderbra have combined on a new integrated ad campaign literally bursting with booby sexism. As the print ad above and video below painfully illustrate: stare at heaving wonderbra-encased breasts at your own risk, lads. (I'm too lazy to translate to English. Besides, you get the unsubtle, juvenile message.) There's more at the accompanying website, including a chance for you to vote for your favorite reader-submitted Miss wonderbra Button. Well, like pretty much every wonderbra ad effort I've seen in recent years (except this one), the unrealistic fantasy message here appeals mostly to men. Not surprising, since the creative team at Leagas was all male. Ladies? Does this make you want to buy a wonderbra?

Next stop on the worldwide sexist ad tour: Dubai.

(click ad for closer look)
Ad for Band-Aids. Line reads: Cures all wounds. Almost. Via ad agency JWT Dubai in the UAE. Male creative team. There there, little lady. Just go get yourself a nice costume ring to cover that awful man wound. Well it's out of the Middle East, so I guess we should be thankful it's not worse. previous stops on the worldwide sexist ad tour: Romania—weight-loss spa ads; Germany—pre-owned BMWs ad; Singapore—Coopers premium light lager ads; Prague—Fernet herbal spirit TV spot; Italy—OXYDO sunglasses ad; Britain—Harvey Nichols women's shoes ad; Israel—Tzomet Sfarim book shops; South Korea—Olympus' auto boobyfocus lens. and America—QSOL servers.

a better example of a "one ad wonder" you will not find.

(click ad to read)
French ad for Yoba erotic toys—it's a masturbating ad! Kudos to the creative team for eschewing the lame double entendre headlines that pollute this category. Boodos to them for not pushing their decent one joke idea further and turning the concept into an excellent campaign. Instead, they just got two more colorfully-dressed women and repeated the same camera trick (see all three ads here). The second & third ads add nothing, and are a complete waste of the client's money. This hemp store ad is still the best "vibrating" one I've ever seen. related: Gilbert Gottfried would be an excellent SpokesPerv for the Fleshlight male sex toy.